[ John huffs a quiet laugh, mostly at Gaius's bewildered fluster, and leans in over his laced fingers like a man conducting an interrogation. ]

Getting there is the easy part, right? You'd just use your teleporting car. If you're the only human in the world, they wouldn't think to suspect you... Just tell them you're tall for a gnome. Steal someone's funny hat. Conduct a heist for a convincing fake beard.

[ He sits back and raises his teacup again to regard Gaius over it. ]

Whatever they're up to, we'll crack the case yet. Personally, I think they're planning war with the pink flamingos.